Talking to a musician that seems from the outside to have the world at her feet, on the cusp of really making waves in the music industry, I would have imagined we would be talking to someone that had all the answers, and confidence in her self, and future.
I was wrong.
Bessie spoke really honestly. Talking about physical, and mental health issues that have affected her for a long time. It was my take that her up-bringing, while much loved by her family, was also challenging, and shaped the way she communicated her feelings to the world. Song writing was her tool to do this.
I am frustrated at myself that I didn’t ask more questions to some of these points she made about this. She spoke a lot, during the podcast, but possibly didn’t feel comfortable enough to open up about these issues. Listening back to the podcast, there are loads of points that cried out for a Why question….'why do you feel like that?’ I didn’t ask these, and she often moved the conversation on quickly.
I myself felt a bit flustered during the beginning of the podcast speaking to her, not sure why that was. Maybe the realisation that having a person's feelings, mental health, and their story to be told, was a big deal, and meant I stumbled in my job as a host, more than I thought I would. Or possibly it was because I was talking to a girl, and I often stumble over my words in that situation. I hope to learn from this as we go on in our podcast journey.
In certain aspects she seemed much more In control in her relationship with music. More certain of what worked for her, than Jez and I ever were, and focused on what a Bessie Turner song meant. She wasn’t afraid to say no to people, and I believe, this will serve her so well In her career. Confidence In her ability as a songwriter was cool to hear, and goes against what I thought; that musicians were always unaware fo how good they might be, or plagued with self doubt on their abilities.
As far as I could see, music is the big thing in her life a positive that she can control and affect, whilst her health has done the opposite to her, a bit of a battle between her mind V’s body letting her down.
We both really liked her, and it was an hour well spent. The podcast is 1 hour 2 mins, and worth a listen if you want to understand what I am talking about...
Listen to this episode on Spotify below or search 'Failed Rockstar Club' wherever you listen to your podcasts .